The New Wave? Mullets are Sweeping AMHS

Be that guy and shave the sides.


With the start of the Spring Sport season, an annual tradition has risen once more: The Mullet, an infamous haircut that peaked in the 80’s. This decade hosted the biggest mullet wave in our modern era, with rock stars David Bowie, Rod Stewart, Keith Richards, and Paul McCartney all rocking this fire cut. Soon, it would be diffused across the UK, Australia, and even continental Europe. While the hysterics revolving around this haircut died down in the mid-2000’s, the mullet remains a central piece in lacrosse, hockey, and tennis culture.

Hey Boris please don’t get a mullet. They’re awful. Mullets are so ugly, so ugly. Please please please please please please please don’t get a mullet.

— Carol Hurt

This past Friday, Boris Pekar, Ransome Hudson, and Chase Roberts took the liberty of giving each other mullets. With expert trimsmanship (the art of haircutting), the three of them cut subtle mullets. Chase decided to get his hair faded, and went to GreatClips the next morning. The result was astonishing. Now with the greatest hair shape of the trio, Chase went on to inspire Turner Orvin to get his own mullet (Turner also had a handshake with Boris, months ago).

The four of us have agreed to keep the mullets through spring break and prom. Over the next two months, we will maintain the mullets while growing out the hair in the front and the back, eventually going to a barber master to get it professionally done. Personally, I will be continuing this haircut through my freshman year of college. If it works, don’t change it.

We would like to shout out the numerous other AMHS students that have been silently flaunting mullets all year long— notably Harrison Shaw. Additionally, it should be noted that Oliver Abar rocked the greatest mullet in Academic Magnet High School’s history. It simply cannot be beat.

Oliver Abar mullet pt.1
Oliver Abar mullet pt.2

Who was our inspiration in starting this mullet journey? Chase was inspired by Andre Agassi, one of the greatest tennis players of all time. Turner was inspired by Héctor Bellerín, one of the only soccer players to wear a mullet. Patrick Kane was Boris’s muse, as his mullet sported during all 3 Stanley Cup victories in the 2010’s is arguably the most influential in the history of sports. Ransome chose the mullet to fully immerse himself in lacrosse culture during his Senior season.


Ransome Hudson, pro mullet barber

Today, on the 9th of March, we will have four people join the mullet wave— three of whom are starters on the lacrosse team. AJ Silber (Attack), Shane Hoffman (Offensive Middie/Defense), and Andrew Moise (LSM/Defense) look to get their mullets styled by Ransome Hudson. Pierson Tobin (basketball/natural lifter) will also be getting his, despite frantic opposition by his girlfriend Kate Gieg. 

All in all, we hope that this surge of mullets will inspire YOU, dear readers, to try out the haircut. It is often shocking how well it works on certain people, and you’ll never know until you try it. Feel free to even ask your mom to cut it, as it is very easy to cut. Experiment with a subtle mullet, a faded mullet, a rattail mullet, a permed mullet, or anything else that you can come up with. The mullet has no limits. It is time to ditch that bowl cut and trash the 18 inch must-fest of hair, and ride the new mullet wave!