I am the sorting hat.  My word is law.  If you have an issue with your house feel free to file a complaint with one of my assistants, Kate Kuisel or Graham Inabnett, who each helped me sort people and will promptly tell you that you are in the wrong.

That being said, I would like to make it abundantly clear that no one house is better than the other and each has its own merits.  In truth, Hufflepuff is my favorite house and it is honestly unfairly overlooked.

We used an intense scientific process to sort people into their houses.  Mainly, if you were cunning and shrewd we put you in Slytherin, if you were kind and loyal we put you in Hufflepuff, if you were extroverted and noble we put you in Gryffindor, and if you were exceedingly intelligent we put you in Ravenclaw.

Gryffindor: This house values courage, bravery, and determination.  Notable characters include Harry Potter, Hermione Granger, Neville Longbottom, Ron Weasley, and Professor McGonagall.

Slytherin: This house produces leaders who are proud, ambitious, and cunning.  It has produced the most dark wizards.  Notable characters include Merlin, Severus Snape, Draco Malfoy, and Tom Riddle.

Hufflepuff: This house values hard work, loyalty, patience and justice.  It has produced the least dark wizards.  Notable characters include Cedric Diggory, Pomona Sprout, and Nymphadora Tonks.

Ravenclaw: This house values wit, learning, and wisdom.  Notable characters include Gilderoy Lockhart, Luna Lovegood, Cho Chang, and Sybill Trelawney.

And without further ado, the houses themselves:

Audrey Alexander: Ravenclaw

Liza Allen: Gryffindor

Caroline Allston: Hufflepuff

Skyler Ayers: Hufflepuff

Natalie Aversano: Slytherin

Jay Baek: Hufflepuff

Colin Baker: Ravenclaw

Adriana Ballinger: Ravenclaw

Baxter Barrett: Gryffindor

Eliza Basel: Ravenclaw

Razeen Basunia: Ravenclaw

Eli Beall: Hufflepuff

Helen Beischel: Gryffindor

Mason Bishop: Gryffindor

Abby Bonner: Hufflepuff

Malia Borg: Gryffindor

Kevin Boyd: Slytherin

Andrew Boyles: Hufflepuff

Bryan Bracy: Slytherin 

Gia Braddock: Ravenclaw

Rion Brown: Gryffindor

Ashley Bryan: Gryffindor

Max Cabrera: Hufflepuff

Adriana Carter: Ravenclaw

Hayley Cash: Ravenclaw

Qian Chang: Slytherin

Beauregard Cochran: Hufflepuff

Sera Cole: Hufflepuff

Alanah Colestock: Gryffindor

Riane Coman: Gryffindor

John Conley: Ravenclaw

Tommy Crookes: Hufflepuff

Josh Cumins: Gryffindor

Beau Dosher: Hufflepuff

Caroline Mackay Drolet: Slytherin

Elly Durante: Hufflepuff

Andrea Edwards: Gryffindor

Mary Helen Elliott: Hufflepuff

Sophie Estoppey:Hufflepuff

Addie Ethredge: Gryffindor

Madison Facello: Ravenclaw

Emma Louise Farmer: Gryffindor

Grace Fellows: Gryffindor

Ethan Fewell: Gryffindor

Jessica Forney: Slytherin

Luke Freudenheim: Hufflepuff

Gage Gailbreath: Ravenclaw

Hannah Garcia: Gryffindor

Ben Garner: Hufflepuff

Julian Gatch: Ravenclaw

Meredith Gee: Hufflepuff

Alec Goldberg: Hufflepuff

Sydney Graves: Slytherin

Jourdan Gruber: Hufflepuff

Zinnia Harris: Hufflepuff

Graysen Hasty: Ravenclaw

Stephen Hilton: Ravenclaw

Stephen Holderness: Gryffindor

Sarah Hudock: Hufflepuff

Graham Inabnett: Slytherin

Shabih Jafri: Gryffindor

Paul Jiang: Hufflepuff

Lyle Johnson: Gryffindor

Miles Jones: Hufflepuff

Anthony Joyce: Hufflepuff

Abby Keating: Ravenclaw

Daniel Killough: Ravenclaw

Andre Koka: Ravenclaw

Lilly Ku: Gryffindor

Kate Kuisel: Slytherin

Lindsay Lankau: Slytherin

Sully Lant: Ravenclaw

Sam Leach: Hufflepuff

Parker LeClerc: Gryffindor

JC Lesesne: Slytherin

Sallie Limehouse: Hufflepuff

Jared Lipton: Ravenclaw

Christopher Littlejohn: Ravenclaw

Ivy Lu: Ravenclaw

Sam Maher: Slytherin

Rachel Maile: Ravenclaw

Will Marshall: Gryffindor

Luke Matthews: Hufflepuff

Hallie McClain: Hufflepuff

Aubry McConnell: Hufflepuff

Connor McPherson: Gryffindor

Carrie Metts: Gryffindor

Chase Mitchum: Ravenclaw

Gabby Mochizuki: Hufflepuff

Zach Moody: Slytherin

Grace Moorman: Hufflepuff

Elizabeth Moseley: Gryffindor

Walton Moseley: Hufflepuff

Devin Narula: Ravenclaw

Nathan Nguyen: Ravenclaw

Aly Nida: Ravenclaw

Matthew Nofsinger: Hufflepuff

Sarah Norman: Gryffindor

Hannah O: Hufflepuff

Janie O’Shea: Gryffindor

Dylan Odell: Ravenclaw

Vinod Pandey: Hufflepuff

John Paradise: Ravenclaw

Mateo Pavic: Ravenclaw

Stuart Philp: Ravenclaw

Trap Puckette: Gryffindor

Anne Claire Purcell: Slytherin

Chloe Putnam: Hufflepuff

Dillon Ranwala: Ravenclaw

Jackson Ray: Hufflepuff

Annie Riesberg: Gryffindor

Bella Rocco: Gryffindor

Sarah Romagnuolo: Hufflepuff

Steven Schlosser: Gryffindor

Emma Sherman: Hufflepuff

Aileen Shi: Ravenclaw

Sidney Simpson: Slytherin

Jake Smalley: Hufflepuff

Rachel Smith: Ravenclaw

Samantha Smith: Slytherin

Kirkland Smith: Slytherin

Morgan Southworth: Gryffindor

James Staubes: Ravenclaw

Rachael Stokes: Hufflepuff

Tori Streetman: Ravenclaw

Rifah Tasnia: Hufflepuff

Anna Tortorici: Gryffindor

Maria Traver: Gryffindor

Ryan Troy: Gryffindor

Ean Tucker: Hufflepuff

Acacia Van Kirk: Hufflepuff

Greta Waits: Slytherin

William Wendt: Ravenclaw

Zach Wallace Wright: Ravenclaw

Rachel Walmet: Gryffindor

Bohan Wang: Ravenclaw

Pauline Wang: Hufflepuff

Victoria Waterfield: Hufflepuff

Max Windom: Hufflepuff

Mary Grace Wolf: Slytherin

Savannah Wray: Ravenclaw

Angela Yang: Ravenclaw

Cannon Yarborough: Slytherin

Lauren Yates: Ravenclaw

Jonathan Ye: Hufflepuff

Caroline Young: Ravenclaw

Esther Yu: Hufflepuff

Forrest Zach: Hufflepuff

Yuna Zhao: Hufflepuff

Andrew Zimlich: Hufflepuff

Greg Zynoyko: Slytherin

The Sorting Hat has spoken.