How to Become Your Parents’ Favorite Child

Because every parent has one, even if they say they don't.

I'm the one in the middle

I'm the one in the middle

This article needs no introduction. Follow these 5 tips if you are feeling on the outs. Even only-children aren’t safe.
  1. Be smart

    ~This tip is a pretty obvious one. In general, smarter people tend to be more successful and are able to support their parents in the future. As my father states, “children are an investment” and just like stocks, you put more resources into the one that is doing better. Bailey Hillen attributes her success in becoming the favorite to her superior intelligence, stating that her brother “has a life coach to spoon feed him high school”.

    My brother has a life coach to spoon-feed him highschool”

    — Bailey Hillen

  2. Don’t have a contradicting opinion

    ~“Go with the flow” is the savvy advice that Mason Leath offers. Although he definitely doesn’t consider himself to be the favorite, he has learned that accepting what life (or a parent) throws at you will make being the second favorite much more bearable for everyone involved. Agree unwaveringly with everything that your parents say, or risk being deemed “disrespectful”, but don’t agree too much, which leads me to my third point… 

  3. Love your parents the perfect amount

    ~This piece of advice is a tricky line to walk. If you constantly dote on your parents, you might come across as needy and annoying. People always want what they can’t have, so naturally giving too much affection won’t leave them wanting more. On the other hand, loving them not enough will grant you the title of “ungrateful”. Your affection should be present but not prominent. 

  4. Be absent unless they tell you to be there

    ~Absence makes the heart grow fonder, and this is true with families. Rosie Booker divulges that the reason her parents love her more is because she’s “never at home unless I have to be”. Conversely, her brother is always at home playing video games. This will of course vary for each family, but getting out of the house not only shows your parents that you are “productive”, but it will make them miss you more. Also they can’t ask you to do stuff if you aren’t there to hear it. 

  5. Give up 

    ~When all else fails (because it probably will), it will be best for your sanity to just give up. Sometimes your parents just don’t like you. Maybe it’s because you’re ugly. Maybe it’s because you remind them of everything that they could have been. Either way, it’s time to count your losses and wait out the rest of your time with them. If you’re feeling especially adventurous, I would recommend turning the tables on them. Become cold and aloof. Withdraw your affection in order to make them vie for it. Make it clear that your love is conditional. Enjoy.