Sometimes the stars are wrong, but we’re always right. As certified astrologers, we are qualified to sort you guys. Some of you stayed the same (Davis) because you act just like your sign (Davis), but a lot of you changed. This is when you should’ve been born.

Disclaimer: Please don’t take any of this to heart. 

Here’s a short description of each sign: 

Aries:

Strengths: passionate, ambitious, enthusiastic, can hurl fire balls

Weaknesses: impulsive, short tempered, dry ice

Leo: 

Strengths: confident, loyal, can recite the entire script of the lion king on command

Weaknesses: confident, melodramatic, keeps reciting the entire script of lion king 

Sagittarius: 

Strengths: exciting, friendly, won the hunger games

Weaknesses: patience, they don’t exist 

Cancer: 

Strengths: emotional, loyal, telepathic, nice 

Weaknesses: emotional, intense, emotional

Pisces: 

Strengths: creative, nice, psychic 

Weakness: airhead, indecisive, evaporation

Scorpio: 

Strengths: passionate, strong willed, strength  

Weaknesses: secretive, possessive, weakness 

Aquarius: 

Strengths: tall (usually), free-spirited, inventive

Weakness: quirky, unemotional, too tall

Gemini: 

Strengths: fun, adaptable, shapeshifter 

Weakness: Split (2016) (the one with Bill from It 2)

Libra:

Strengths: charming, diplomatic, great gymnasts 

Weaknesses: unreliable, condescending

Taurus: 

Strengths: good friends, determined, very good at freeze tag 

Weaknesses: stubborn, lazy, very bad at regular tag 

Virgo:

Strengths: best at giving advice, Virgo 

Weaknesses: worst at following advice, Virgo 

Capricorn: 

Strengths: practical, good leaders, Finn Wolfhard 

Weaknesses: Brent Rivera, pessimistic, moody

Mallory Alexander: Scorpio 

Devonte Alston: Capricorn

Ashley Anderson: Cancer 

Gage Andrews: Pisces 

Pearl Ayiku: Virgo

Harrison Babb: Cancer 

Caelan Bailey: Virgo 

Amanda Beall: Aquarius 

Jack Catalano: Aries 

Catherine Chopade: Taurus 

Kaki Cobb: Taurus 

Jameson Condon: Sagittarius 

Mark Condon: Aries 

Jackson Coppola: Leo

Thomas Crowley: Aquarius 

Clara Cullum: Aquarius sun Aries moon

Zoey Bennett: Aquarium 

Lanie Berrigan: Pisces

Cade Bitting: Capricorn 

Benjamin Black: Cancer

Christian Blackburn: Aries

Charles Blanc: Pisces 

Rosie Booker: Cancer 

Lily Borders: Libra 

Cassie Brisbin: Capricorn 

Alaina Broomall: Virgo 

Emma Broucqsault: Cancer 

Clarke Brunson: Gemini 

Camila Carrillo: Virgo 

Sam Carson: Aquarius 

Piper Carter: Leo

Vivian D’Souza: Virgo

Clyde Davis: Cancer 

Andrew de Arellano: Scorpio 

Ethan DeMille: Cancer 

Molly Dickerson: Libra

Jack Dillard: Capricorn

Lucas Dillard: Aquarius 

Mia DiPaolo: Capricorn

Sophia Discolo: Taurus

Josephine Drake: Gemini

Shea Duncan: Scorpio sun Cancer moon Pisces rising

Lesesne Early: Libra

Seth Early: Leo

Caroline Fair: Taurus 

Sam Ford-Dirks: Taurus 

Hannah Forman: Capricorn

Emily Furtick: Gemini 

Gabby Gagnon: Virgo

Emory Gardner: Cancer

Sully Gholson: Nice

Carson Goodier: Virgo

Finn Gottlieb: 🙁 Scorpio

Robby Gourdie: Virgo

Megan Gray: Cancer

Kasen Groves: Aquarius 

Julia Guo: Pisces

Grace Gurney: Virgo

Lucas Haas: Libra

Riley Haas: Capricorn

Luke Haenel: Pisces

Charlie Hale: Cancer

Emma Heeke: Libra

Lilli Heinrich: Cancer 

Lily Herpolsheimer: Aquarius 

Bailey Hillen: Leo

Chap Hodges: Taurus sun Cancer moon

Alex Huang: Aries

Caroline Hyde: Sagittarius 

Libby Jaskwhich: Gemini

Mary Ashton Jenkins: Aries 

Taliyah Jenkins: Gemini 

Juliet Johnson: Aquarius 

Kathryn Jones: Libra

Lil Cynth: Aquarius 

Will Jordan: Leo

Simone Kavarana: Pisces

Brendan Kelleher: Capricorn

Ricky Keys: Aries

Ameen Khan: Libra

Will Kronsberg: Virgo

Angeline Krupa: Sagittarius 

Claire Kunkle: Pisces

Eliza Lankford: Taurus

Sabrina Lawrence: Virgo 

Davis Leath: Leo 

Mason Leath: Gemini

Jonathan Lemon: Gemini 

Eli LeRoy: Divergent

Ella Lesesne: Cancer

Jack Levenson: Libra

Elan Levine: Gemini

Oliver Lewis: Aquarius 

Allison Li: Cancer

Angela Li: Sagittarius 

Erin Littlejohn: Aries

Stephanie Lomeli-Garcia: Gemini

Irene Lu: Cancer

Caroline Lucas: Aquarius

Maria Lutas: Virgo

Ellie Marino: Scorpio 

Mary Hope Martin: Pisces

Elizabeth Moise: Pisces 

Piper Monk: Cancer

Nicolette Monnier: Sagittarius

Lee Muirhead: Aries

Quinna Muthard: Aquarius 

Kyler Nguyen: Scorpio 

Daniel Nichols: Cancer 

Dessie Anne Nietert: Virgo

Jacob Norman: Libra

David Novo: Pisces 

Lauren Osborne: Virgo

Brianna Otero: Leo

Caelan Paquette: Taurus 

Avery Parker: Taurus 

Caroline Patterson: Pisces

Jack Patterson: Cancer 

Reid Perrett: Leo

Lily Peterson: Leo 

Emma Grace Pittard: Aries 

Lydia Pless: Gemini

Katie Radovanovic: Aquarius 

Allison Rauls: Virgo 

Katherine Ray: Aquarius 

Stella Reimer: Taurus 

Jonathan Roberts: Virgo

David Roddey: Aries sun Pisces moon

Sammy Rosenberg: Pisces

Shreyon Roy: Aquarius

Susannah Ryan: Taurus

Fernanda Salinas: Cancer

Stephen Savage: Gemini

Mina Schaafsma: Leo sun Aquarius moon Libra rising

Jacob Schar: Pisces

Will Schnell: Aries

Michal Segle: Leo

Kory Singleton: Aquarius

Toby Sizemore: Leo

Madison Smalley: Leo

Allyson Smith: Libra

Kyle Smith: Sagittarius

Julia Spencer: Sagittarius

Sloane Stoklosa: Gemini sun Libra moon

Michelle Sun: Capricorn

Masi Sundara: Aries

Abby Sutterlin: Aries

Jamie Terry: Scorpio

Jake Thayer: Virgo

Jordan Thomas: Gemini

Isobel Tingley: Cancer

Christie Tran: Aquarius

Amber Tu: Aquarius

Godwins Tuyishime: Pisces

Simon Vaglienti: Libra

Ben Vazquez Mora: Aquarius

Kedar Veeraswamy: Leo sun Scorpio moon

Kaitlyn Victoria: Gemini

Dhillon Wegner: Aquarius

Christian Weichsel: Libra

Ebonie White: Virgo 

Sam White: Sagittarius 

Emily Williams: Pisces

Sophia Wilson: Capricorn

Sophia Zhang: Virgo

Gabby Ziegler: Gemini sun

P.S. New seniors not included. The stars don’t know you yet.