Class of 2017 Senior Wills

Class of 2017 Senior Wills

As graduation is upon us, it is time for the Class of 2017 to leave their legacies in the classic Magnet tradition of the Senior Wills. And now, what you’ve all been waiting for; The Class of 2017 Senior Wills:

I, Jackson Barna, being of unfiltered mind and dad body, do hereby leave J.J. Bishop, the AMHS Investment Club, do not run it into the ground. To Daniel Lehman, the highly regarded and highly serious Bowling Club. To Thomas McNerney, I leave you plenty more visits with Ms. Redfern and not as many car wrecks. To Jojo Cumins, I leave you the task of looking after Dr. Altman. To Jack Niesse, I leave you 140 characters to tweet as much cringy stuff as you’d like #BoilerUp. To Mary Claire Newsom, I leave my everlasting protection. To Coco Kelly, I leave the best secret handshake ever. To Meghan Cradock, I leave a giant jar of pulled off can tabs. To Gavin Duffy, I leave short but frequent hallway conversations to a new unlikely friend. To Chase Michaelson, I leave the knowledge that you look like the kid from Monster House. To Gregg Gardner, I leave unlimited button down wears. To Chris Thomasson, I leave the probable future harassment from administration. To Andrew Potts, I leave my treadmill so you can forever “sweat it out.” And finally to Will Donnellon my cherished spirit responsibilities.

I, Grace Beischel, being of potato mind and chicken nugget body, do hereby leave the Girls swim team all my death stares and snarky comments for when coach makes you do a stupid set. I leave Skyler Ayers the lead spot in the chill lane and all of my stress baking recipes. I leave Malia Borg my best napping blankie. To the lacrosse team I leave my unruly checks and anger fueled harassment of the other team. I leave Janie O’Shea my best eye rolls ;). To Helen Beischel I leave my shortest shorts, my best, “Oh cool!” to make dad think you’re listening, and my driver’s manual maybe you can look at it.

I, Sophie Bello, being of pale body and eclectic mind, do hereby leave the following: To my soulmate, Garrett Kelly, I leave a one way plane ticket to Canada and a lifetime supply of chokers, Blistex, and vegan ramen. To the sassiest person I have ever met, Chase Mitchum, I leave a pot of gold at the end of the rainbow and my blessing to continue being as savage as humanly possible. To Yonkle, I leave Weatherford’s mohawk, and to answer your question: no, I will not see you at practice. To Jack McFee, I leave my incredible fashion skills, because he needs them… badly (see: neon shoes/shorts combo, gold American Apparel pants, and even shiner looks at the Exchange Factor). To Brett Lavelle, I leave Isabella’s heart. To Evelyn Bi, I leave a much needed meditation vacation, all the graphic design internships in the world, and a wardrobe of European runway fashion. Finally, to Mr. Wright, I leave a journey down Warrior Road. And with that, I leave AMHS.

I, Bobby Boyles, being of able mind and able body, do hereby leave all of the Led Zeppelin and Pink Floyd albums in the world to Andrew Boyles.

I, Sophie Brams, being of wild mind and brunch filled body, do hereby leave Eliot Leadem 50% of the Talon. To Josh Cumins I leave the family legacy- make us proud! To Mr. Stackhouse I leave my National Kickball Title. And with that, I officially leave the Bird Cage- Go raptors!

I, Katie Conley, being of thrifty mind and fruity body do hereby leave Garrett Kelly a small bowl of overpriced guacamole, my goodwill discount card, and a plane ticket between from Quebec, Canada to Albuquerque, NM. I also leave my legacy, John Conley, efficient parking lot exit skills and a frozen vegan burrito in the bottom drawer of the outdoor freezer. And lastly, to Cameron Bush, I leave a razor scooter, rotting pineapple, and a pile of sticks and Christmas trees.

I, Elsa Crowe, being of fiery mind and pale body, do hereby leave Sophia Shepp my good vibes, motivation to finish thesis, and embarrassing stories: Eli LeRoy my gold skills, love for basketball, and also a pet bunny if I had one; Lila Clark my love for sir, my amazing anatomy skills, and the “big idea”; and Ashley Bryan my photography talents and Danielle’s hairbrush.

I, Conor Coleman, being of Lil Uzi mind and Lil Yachty body do hereby leave an endless amount of shish kabobs and dino chicken nuggets to Sam Maher. To Will Schnell I leave a pack of ranch sunflower seeds. To Andrew Zimlich I leave an iPod with one song on it, XO TOUR Llif3. I leave the soccer nest to Mason Bishop. Finally and most importantly, I leave the 3rd Captain of the varsity soccer team to Chase Michaelsen. Take care of it and wear the band with pride and honor.

I, Lexi DeHart, being of bad mind and boujee body, do hereby leave so many boxes of very berry Cheerios to Jack Niesse. Eat your heart out. To Mia Di Paolo I leave Mr. Stackhouse and the rest of the girl’s golf team. Make me proud. For Elena Wilson, I’ll return all those tshirts I never sold (sorry again), and the malfunctioning slide at Hamline Plantation Pool. Upon Baxter Barrett I bestow Julian. Take good care of him for me. To Kevin Walsh and Duncan Streit I leave you the keys to my house and the downstairs tv since you basically live there anyway. And finally to my brother, Chris DeHart I leave you all the teachers that didn’t like me senior year. Good luck.

I, Thomas Dorfner, being of questionable mine and minimal body, do hereby leave to Nate Shirley a lifetime supply of hamburgers so you may grow strong, to Jack Hosley a brush for the hair you should never cut, along with the username and password for the AMHS Baseball Twitter account. To Owen Duffy I leave the responsibility of naming the next player to hold the title of Scribe. And finally my most prized possession, sought after by many and few simultaneously. This Prize, the Throne of Phillips and all responsibilities that come with it, shall be left to Ethan Fewell, on the condition that if I ever return to visit you will temporarily relinquish the Throne until my visit is over.

I, Lidia DiPaolo, being of unique mind and easily scared body, do hereby leave the following. To my stellar PF girls and William Tipton, I leave the debate team. To Jackson Averill and Christian Blackburn, I leave football game ticket sales. To Mack Lehman, I leave awkwardly-yet comfortably-crossing your hands. To Jack Dillard, I leave the best carpool family and harshly criticizing Mia’s driving. And finally, to my dear sister Mia DiPaolo, I leave the 007 parking space and the DiPaolo legacy. I love you <3!!

I, Tom Feingold, being of Freaky Deaky mind and constantly eating body, do hereby leave the following: the Shell Ring morning carpool to Anna Tortorici (throw an apple off a bridge for me) and Ryan Troy (stop stressing), sole custody of MOO Alpha Theta and the pi-in-the-face board to Jenny, memories of physics and the Kou Kou solo to Brett Lavelle, endless car rides to Kelsey and Lydia, a whiteboard and admittance to college in Canada to Abby, He-Who-Shall-Not-Be-Named and a 5 on Chem to Chloe, the task of another state title to the boys’ swim team, a couple hundredths off a 200 IM to Sam White, and the Feingold legacy on the Bonds Wilson campus and all of my high school knowledge to Sam and Lily.

I, Sarah Feingold, of spastic mind and sprightly body, do hereby leave Elise Blackburn at least twenty more iHop dates and a bucket of kiwis with exceptionally furry skins. To Annalise Hafner, I leave an endless supply of interval workouts in the pouring rain, an extra ten seconds of waiting before every run in memory of my special garmin, and your weight in carrots. To Carly Hall, I leave seventeen chickfila milkshakes, all of the hour-long minivan rant-chats, and a definite spot on the 2018 state swim team, should you choose to take it. To Caroline Seymour, I leave a cake of whatever flavor you desire to be enjoyed by the seaside, a truckload of bagels, and fond memories of my poor navigational skills. I also leave Caroline the responsibility of being the track-mother; feel free to co-parent with Annalise if you’d like. To Kate Kuisel I leave every ounce of cautiousness that I have ever had in my body; goodness knows you need it, and I don’t particularly want it for college. I also leave Kate the last leg of the 4x800m relay, and finally, I leave her Annalise, Carly, and Caroline. It is imperative that y’all do the lucky stretch and kiss the baton before each and every race. Godspeed. To Malia Borg and Skyler Ayers, I leave Lillian May Feingold. She is precious, and must be guarded with your lives. Lastly, I leave the eight-year Feingold legacy to Lily Feingold. Serve it to the best of your ability. To the entirety of Magnet, I leave the responsibility to find my quizlets on your own. Happy Cramming!

I, Zach Harley, being of barley mind, and hornet body, do hereby leave the following. To Nathan Shirley, I leave my French skills; I believe you will find them of value. I also leave hallway talks about sports, what you have gotten yourself into now, and Ball is Not Life. Take care of the latter for me. To Jackson Howe, I leave our morning French homework sessions and hugs; I’m going to miss those. To Addie Ethredge I leave casual acknowledgements in the hallway and sarcastic comments. Don’t let those eyes get stuck in the back of your head. To Janie O’Shea I leave the fun that is French class, (have fun without me) and countless bad jokes. To Lauren Clifford I leave countless car rides both to and from school full of laughing, weird dancing, and random noises. Take care of Layla for me, you know how she is. To Nahom Gebreselassie I leave Spongebob impersonations. Do them justice my friend, and take care of Piggy. Finally, to Elliot Leadem, Will Donnellon, Brennan Kosut, and Matthew Roark I leave my bad golf shots. Have fun, and don’t use all the Taco Bell coupons at once. Peace out Raptors, it’s been real.

I, Maya Haley, being of active mind and lazy body do hereby leave Jack Niesse the responsibility of checking in with Paul at least once a week to make sure he’s still around or not in jail. In Paul’s name, Jack Niesse will also receive part ownership in the Box Hotel. To Chris Thomasson I leave the floor of my Park Circle house. To Meredith Gee I leave the routine of leaving the neighborhood at the last possible minute to get to school right at 8:30. To Meg and Coco I leave lots of dance parties and endless girls nights. To Claire Dickman and Karl Pless I leave the joys of French class with Mr. Jent.

I, Sohan Kotecha, being of milky mind and caramel body, do hereby leave the following: My eggs to Giorgio Cracchiolo, my broken mixing bowl to Abby Tickle (thanks…), my sugar a.k.a. the AMHS Chess Team to Bohan Wang, and last but definitely not least, my prized secret chocolate chip cookie recipe passed down four generations to Josh Cumins. Peace out Magnet.

I, Isabella Harmony Knowles, being of absent mind and clumsy body, do hereby leave the back room at Exchange Factor for Jack “McFetus” Shadeslayer. Your style could use a sexy jolt. To Krampus, I couldn’t decide so I figure I’ll leave (among other things) Quinn’s knees. Evelyn! To you I leave for you my relaxed attitude and disability to stress over the little things. Skip class and smell the roses once in awhile! To Sarah Harrington I leave the joy that is Adult Caillou. For Skyler, I leave a reminder that no pants are the best pants. May you never forget that truth. Yonkle: I bestow you with my driving skillz, your car is the only one rivals the van has in terms of old and janky. May it serve you well if Bennet ever throws party or if you just simply need to freak out at a pond. For Fanny I leave a memorable popsicle incident and an even more memorable Jewish Holiday. May we continue to pretend we will actually workout sometime. To Weatherford, I leave successful abandoned building explorations and a Full Throttle. Also, RIP the squirrel…it will live on in my heart. To Sarah Lawrence Yetman I leave athletic shorts to borrow,  the house of God, the ability to remember how to order at Mexican restaurants, and Weatherford. To Damon I leave my father, he loves you. Finally, to everyone: Live long and prosper. Farewell Magnet, it’s been…interesting!

I, Erika Ludden, being of immature mind and even less mature body, do hereby leave the contents of the AMHS lost and found to JJ Bishop. It was me. To Josh Cumins I leave one new silky robe. To Lea, Isabell, and Belle I leave you not only with the responsibility to get Lagh to school on time but the task of keeping carpool jams alive.

I, Nate LeRoy, being of  mind and slightly above average body, do hereby leave the face-guarding duties of the AMHS basketball team and an Uno wild card to Thomas McNerney. To Bryson Rose, I leave my sharp-shooting skills and the UNC fan club of Magnet. To Mason Bishop and Trapp Puckette I leave the back line of the soccer team and future carpools full of freshman. To Chase Michaelsen, I leave the keys to my house and a stuffed Beluga whale. To Eli LeRoy, I leave the LeRoy legacy. Try not to screw it up.

I, English Laserna, being of foggy mind and tall body, do hereby leave to Grace Tumbleston, my waitressing job at the Fillin’ Station Diner. I also leave you the softball team, basketball team, and the responsibility of keeping the nickname “Baehom” alive in me and Caroline Blacks honor. Please do us right. To Mia DiPaolo, I leave first base and a pink penny board. To Ashley Bryan, I leave my inability to see colors. To Caroline Mitchum, I leave my parents, in which you must feed and take to sporting events regularly. To Rion Brown and Bryn Gerding, I leave the talent in volleyball I never had, please use it well. To Brookelynn Miller, I also leave the softball team even though you already knew that. To Anne Claire Purcell, I leave my knock-off kicks and a  button. To Nahom Gebreselassie, I leave all my love. To Cassie Brisbin and Rianna Lash, I leave you dugout food and the next three years without Hoff. To Erin Littlejohn, I leave the next bad pitcher you have to catch for. To Morgan Southworth, I leave the fear of using restrooms and a cup. And with that, I leave AMHS.

I, Quinn Laudenslager, being of unfiltered mind and small body, do hereby leave the following. To Lindsay Lankau I leave Rides to and from school, all of my music, the ok for you to borrow any of the clothes I leave behind, the sports section of the yearbook, and my outstanding attendance at sporting events. You better go to all of them, even if they’re an hour and a half a way on a Tuesday night. To JJ Bishop I leave a million videos of you batting and an award for best car to sit after school. To Owen Duffy I leave you my red couch. Ethan Fewell is left my unrequited love and “i kissed a girl” as your permanent walk up song. I Leave my braiding skills to Jack Hosley, you’re going to need them. To Abby Tickle I leave long drives to the basketball games and a promise that ill always give you a ride whenever you have a torn ACL. Grace Gehlken, this could possibly be the most important thing I’m leaving, Emma Hillis and I are leaving you REACH club and Instagram account. I hope it gives you as many great memories as it gave us. To Carolyn Prickett i leave all of the fruit I can carry, especially strawberries. To Mia DiPaolo i leave my love for the DiPaolos and an invitation to come visit me during my gap year. Finally, to all of AMHS, I leave a giant thank you for the wonderful memories I’ve made in the past three years. Transferring to this school was a great decision and there is not another place I would have wanted to be for high school. I leave all of my love and gratitude with the class of 2017.

I, Martyn Lemon, being of tactful mind and well-intentioned body, do hereby leave the following for the future generations of Academic Magnet: To JJ Odell, I leave exclusive command of the 4x800m relay. To Andrew DeArellano, I leave a masculine voice. To Jonathan Lemon, I leave a pull-up bar and good decisions. To Aidan Gomez, I leave memes beyond memes and my IP Address. To Brett Schlesinger, I leave a stolen banana. And finally, to the entire student body, remember this: if a wall impedes your path to success, smash through it and achieve your goals.

I, Ethan Linhart being of absent mind and broken body do hereby leave my long day to Ethan Fewell. I also leave my habit of getting head injuries to Max Windom. To Luke Freudenheim and Josh Cumins I leave my heart. To Zachary Kronsberg and Grace Gehlken I leave all my student council knowledge and a couple of “hey burrito” cheers. To Thomas Mcnerney and Bryson Rose I leave the basketball team and little things. To Jack Neisse I leave the table. To Alec Waring I leave whatever is left of my brain. To Baxter Barrett I leave BOFA and an open house. To Andrew Potts I leave a sock. To Jack Hosley I leave scissors to cut your hair. To JJ Bishop I leave the baseball team and an empty fish tank. To Nate Shirley, I leave driving lessons. I leave Will Marshall my phone number to give to his sister. I leave Eli LeRoy and David Roddey the key to all the freshmen girls’ hearts. To Mr. Corson, I leave peace, quiet, and a packet of Crystal Light. To Ms. Hurt I leave a journal. I leave Dr. Altman a lifetime supply of scarves. I leave the rights to the rivalry with Bishop England to every student at Academic Magnet. I love you Magnet. I had a long day 😉

I, James Myrick, being of collected mind and and chiseled body, do hereby leave my sass, eternal friendship and 3 cats to Sophie Myrick (no shaking), my love and appreciation (plus my fast metabolism) to Chloe Belton, my peace of mind and dumb luck with thesis to Ethan Kautz, my Ancap memes and love of political discourse to Kirkland Smith, the D&D club and Academic Bowl to William Wendt, and a Vintage 1996 wrapped copy of Why Kids Shouldn’t Drink Lava to John Staubes. You guys are the greatest, and I’ll remember you all.

I, Samantha Moody, of spontaneous mind and dancing body, do hereby leave my car to my brother Zachary Moody so he no longer has to walk to school after swim practice at 7 in the morning when I am still asleep at home. I also leave my Quizlet account to him and any other underclassman who needs it. Hopefully it will save you valuable study time and allow you to get more sleep than I ever did in high school. Finally, I leave the AMHS Dance Team to Ivy Lu, Hallie McClain, and Chloe Putnam, so that they may govern it with the help of Eliza Lankford, Irene Lu, and Ebonie White. I wish you the best of luck next year! Make some great memories and dance like no one is watching!

I, Hannah Massar, being of salty mind and noodle-y body, do hearby leave to Lauren Cuppy the food locker and the responsibility of feeding the entire girls varsity soccer team, as well as the promise to feed yourself and the demand to send to me in college the exact same amount of gum taken in the last 3 years. Also to maybe look for my cup that you lost. To Maggie Van Thullenar, I leave all goals everywhere, especially that foot or so between me and the crossbar that you could reach and I couldn’t, and the power to use the tarps and water wisely to run turf drills. To AC Purcell, I leave plenty of goldfish, a roll of paper towels so that you may clean up your own dang messes, and Jourdan Grueber. To Jojo Grueber, I leave all the food you could eat from the food locker, the snapchat streak I lost (I’m sorry), the responsibility to keep AC from buying more shoes, and my dog. To Garrett/Garell Kelly, I leave a venti unicorn frappé, a bag of Takis (the gross spicy ones), the hope that you may one day discover “what is this really about?,” and all of my future stress hiccups. To Sophie Estoppey, I leave my parking spot in the hope that your parents might actually let you drive your own car to school one day, as well as an FBI badge to flash – use it wisely.

I, Connor Pizii, being of lachrymose mind and uxorious body leave a list of mischievous rising seniors to Lindsay Lankau.

I, Ryan Pace, being of so fresh mind and so clean body, do hereby leave my knack for writing newspaper articles about music and food to Jack Niesse, Campbell Daffin, and Eliot Leadem, a snapchat streak to Emma Louise Farmer, spagettti cheese to Josh Cumins, and a thesis on the importance of prescription drug abuse prevention to all future Magnet students.

I Gabi Rauls, being of intelligent mind and bootyliscious body, do hereby leave: The Academic Magnet Volleyball team to Bryn Gerding, Caroline Mitchum, and Semaj Fielding.  Also to Semaj, this is shorts. To Ms. Novinger, my undying devotion to the art of distraction. To Joe Rodgers, a pair of stolen sunglasses. To Anne Claire Purcell, I leave the title of soccer team DJ. To Emma Ladd, Meredith Gee, and Lauren Osborne I leave the danger zone. Do with it what you will. To Maggie Van Thullenar, I leave all of my now unnecessary University of Alabama gear. Cherish it. To Riane Coman and Abby Tickle I leave several extra doses of composure (though I doubt you’ll need it). To Rowan, I leave Lauren Osborne. Take care of her and guide her in the middle. To the entire AMHS Girls Soccer team I leave my love. Thanks for the best 3 years of my life and DWCC. To Allison Rauls, I leave the Rauls legacy. Protect it, value it, and succeed. I know you will.

I, Lily Rumph, of “it’s fine” mind and torn ACL body, do hereby leave a fancy new bench for Murray’s lax bench; a bee suit for Katherine Ray with which to care for her bees; bermuda shorts and self-confidence to Helen Beischel; all the necessary components to break the crip squad curse to Rachel Walmet; an infinite amount of eyerolls for physics to Peyton Ritter; and finally, my best Dennis inspired groundball drills, the best movie of all time, Crooked Arrow, and nuts to the girls lacrosse team.

I, Liam Rowley, being of prophetic mind and sculpted body here by leave the minivan to Will Donnellon, the camera and croakies to Jack Niesse, Jackson Howe is delegated to disperse the dodgeballs to those he sees fit, Joe Rodgers may have the remnants of my wealth on the condition Giorgio facilitates its conversion to euro, the sunglasses to Daniel Lehman so Joe may be safe from his scorn, Will’s golf clubs to Chase Michaelson, a fine steak to Earl Navarro, and Gregg’s car to Meg and Coco.

I, Hannah Reed, with procrastinating mind and uncoordinated body, do hereby leave the following: to Eliot Leadem and Michael Pi, I leave the French National Honor Society. Try not to bother Dr. Altman as much as I did. To Dr. Altman, I leave my last hopes of getting a 5 on the AP French exam. To Janie and Rachel, I leave the responsibility of being the coolest DJs on the lacrosse team #rainie. To Rachet Walnut, I leave you a secret sister who will spoil you with nut-free and dairy-free snacks. To the rest of the lacrosse team, keep up the positivity that I always admire in all of you, and may you have the best season ever next year!! To Mrs. Hooffstetter, I leave you an even cooler Star Wars button than the one that mysteriously disappeared during Algebra 2 sophomore year. Thank you for everything, Red Ted!! To the cross country team, I hope the beach run does not kill you, you are always ready at 3:44 and you make the hill your you-know-what like I never could. Thanks for a great four years!! To Brent Harwell (aka Class Pet), I leave the final legacy of the greatest AP Biology class ever. Wear that t-shirt with pride. To Sam and Belle, I leave you a multitude of college acceptances and the tour guide from the Seine river cruise. To John, Janie, Mary Helen, Sidney, and Rachel, I leave you Dr. Altman on 4 cups of coffee and an unlimited supply of blue backpacks. To Carolyn Prickett, I leave you the strength to finish Physics and a lacrosse scholarship to any college you want. To the AMHS community, I leave my regrets for never riding my horse to school, and my condolences for the unlucky soul who gets my junior year parking spot; you have quite the trek to school each morning.

I, Potter Seibels, being of inveterate mind and lanky body, do hereby leave the following. To Carly Hall, I leave the ski trip. To any rising senior, I leave the slightly guttural chant “OY OY” to be shouted anywhere and at any point at school (the Hogan legacy lives on). To Andrew Demetry, I leave a hole in the wall. To Baxter Barrett, I leave the ability to better plan future events. To Doscher Hill, I leave a deer and duck hunt (enjoy them, as I will be unable to) and the obligation to lead the lacrosse team. To Chris Big-John, I leave an exceptional future and unlimited positive vibes. To Mr. Johnston, I leave many thanks with thesis assistance and a captains license. To Bryn Gerding, I leave the Beach Volleyball Club. To Max Windom, I leave the hope and dream of playing football. To Will Jordon, I leave the minuscule responsibility of playing that one position in football where you hand the ball off every play. To Chris Thomasson, I leave many daily complaints about going to football or lacrosse practice. To JJ Odell, I leave summer preseason football runs at the Battery (good luck getting anyone to show up), the football stretching duties, and the post practice push-up duties. To Jack Niesse, I leave the lacrosse stretching duties. And finally, to Steven Schlosser, I leave the entire football offense and lacrosse face-off duties. To the track team, I leave countless skipped practices and my seemingly eternal ineligibility. And to the magnet community, I leave the spirit of competition with Bishop England and the end of the Seibels legacy.

I, Abby Spencer, being of tired mind and even more tired body do hereby leave Christopher Dehart a box of toasted cheez itz and Dosher Hill my name (its Abby). I also leave Jack Neisse the love of Campbell Garrard.

I, Maya Stefanelli , being of dog obsessed  mind and injured body, do hereby leave to Malia Borg  a lot of things but most importantly I leave you the legacy of our lit morning car rides and as much taco bell as you can eat. To Skyler Ayers I leave all of my sass (use it wisely). To both of you I leave my mom-friend status and the SMRT swimming OGs legacy. To Carolyn Prickett I leave the best swim sister presents possible and the responsibility to continue being the best swim sister ever. To Brent Harwell I leave the girls varsity swim team. Last but not least I leave the AMHS girls swim team my undying love and support #getthebling.

I, Carter Shubert of eight year old mind and bountiful body do hereby leave the following: To Eliot Leadem, I leave the number one in the region magnet golf team, stay on top next year. To Will Donnellon, I leave many runs to Taco Bell and scrumptious five buck boxes. To Chase Michaelson, I leave Borat and all of his adventures as well as a flattened tortilla. To Dillan Drymon, I leave some gnarly waves and a life as a lawyer

I, Kara Schwacke, being of dyslexic mind and electric body do hereby leave Baxter Barrett with the task of finding a better prom date than me, to Emma Sherman I leave extra time in the morning to go to your locker. Im going to miss you guys. To JJ Bishiop I leave the entire party scene of Johns Island, be careful it gets wild out there. To Owen Duffy I leave pee-stain remover, have fun trying to unmark that territory. To Kegan Larkins I leave a hallway dab. To Carolyn Prickett I leave St. Matthews, I know you’ll have better attendance than I did. To Joe Rogers I leave the sand fleas and tastemade videos, enjoy. Finally to Mary Grace Wolfe I leave my most cherished possesion, Baxter, I know you’ll take good care of him.

I, Aaron Thornton, being of vivacious mind and extravagant body, do hereby leave Trapp Puckett: Mason Bernard, and Mason Bernard: Trapp Puckett. May you boys eternally enjoy the beautiful friendship you have developed over your first two years at Academic Magnet. I leave Sam Maher with my legacy, enjoy my friend. I leave Bryan Bracy with the most inspiring smile and jubilation I have ever seen. Thanks for always providing me with something to laugh at. I leave Adam Ziff the Boys Varsity Soccer team (take care of the children for me, they are delicate). I leave Dillon Wegner with his H. I leave Will Schnell with all my snacks to fulfill his munchies. I leave Max Windom with all the information and experiences that Paul Whitaker and I have shared with you. Lastly, I leave Maggie Van Thullenar with Auburn soccer, my promise that one day I will make it up to Auburn to watch you play, and an everlasting friendship <3. Thanks for a fantastic four years Magnet. It’s been fun.

I, Natasha Tirpak, being of spici mind and dank body do hereby leave the following. To Ligament Lila Clark, I leave the thiqqest action potential, peaNUT butter cookies, simplest squamous, and the presidency of High School Musicals Club. Please don’t let it die. To Meredith Coen, I leave Beyonce’s Halo and R. Kelly’s Remix to Ignition. Keep things hot and fresh out the kitchen. To Anne Claire Purcell, I leave my incomplete stats homework and my formula sheets. To Morgan Southworth, I leave my longest yeah boi ever and the biggest chicken nugget. To Ashley Bryan, Lily Ku, and Greg Tumbleston, I leave all of my “hard work”. To the AMHS Varsity Girls Basketball Team, I leave you every lap I ever skipped and the secrets to Operation Skinny Legs. You know what to do. To the AMHS Girls Swim Team, I leave you all my complaints about swimming. Whatever you do, please don’t quit. Keep the state legacy alive. To Skyler Ayers, I leave every smile, hug, and baked good in the world. And finally to Academic Magnet, I leave my soul because that was stolen from me the minute I stepped on campus freshman year.

I, Maggie Winters, being of trash mind and trash body, do hereby leave a perfectly dissected cat carcass, a framed portrait of Sir’s face on shrek’s body, and the High School Musicals Club to Lila Clark, both of my knees to Rachel Walmet so she has a few extra just in case, an infinite number of “how italians…” memes and italian handholds to Helen Beischel, a single chicken nugget and an undying love for Jacob Sartorius to Katherine Ray, my balance to Bella Rocco, my best advice:”passing and catching ladies!” and the best nuts money can buy to the girls lacrosse team.

I, Kevin Woods, being of shredding mind and gnarly body, do hereby leave the titles of “President of the Surf Club” to Owen Duffy, the “Best Physics Student Award” to Nate Shirley, and I leave Skirly Firly for Josh Cumins. Peace out Magnet.

I, Zoe Wright, being of sober mind and untamed body, do hereby leave frantic car rides to school to Caroline Anderson (If you survived this year in the car, you can survive everything else). To the entire class of 2018, I leave the horror of Magnet without Mrs. Peterson, HAH. I leave all of the french homework Karl Pless, and all of the french homework “help” to Max.  I leave the spirit of my parking spot to Ean Tucker, and finally, the incredible responsibility of the Talon will be left to Jack Niesse, who shall assume half of the important role of Editor in Chief. Bye Magnet.

I, Julia Zimlich, being of blonde mind and pale body, do hereby leave the following. To Malia Borg and Skyler Ayers, I leave the endless pursuit of the bling and the strength to hold your breath in the Danny Jones locker room. To Andrew Zimlich, I leave the honor of being the second favorite Zimlich child and full custody of our car, Sebastian, – take good care of him. To Will Marshall, I leave a year long supply of silent morning car rides. And finally, to the Girls Varsity Swim Team, I leave my love and of course… no mercy.