Ranking College Rejections

Sarah Baer and Lilly Skinner: Co-Editor|April 5, 2023

Note: Letters that aren’t our own are anonymous unless requested otherwise:
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Tis the season of college acceptance letters (and rejections). Going to this school can sometimes make people feel that they are the only ones receiving rejections, but we can ensure you that EVERYONE has faced rejections throughout this process. However, just like how there are different levels of college applicants, there are certainly different levels of college rejection letters. We know this article is long so if you want a SparkNotes version of the best phrases please scroll down to the bottom. Overall, there are a few different philosophies

I feel like schools try to follow:

1) Short and to the point:

These letters leave you wondering: I wrote 3 supplementals and you write 3 sentences?? Usually, they simply tell you that you aren’t in and then wish you luck. I have respect for these because everyone knows the extra words in a letter really don’t do anything to pad your crushed hopes and dreams when it’s for your dream school.

2) Complimentary but falls flat

Don’t get me wrong, a compliment is nice, but when accompanied by a rejection, I’m not quite in the mood. This makes more sense with waitlist letters. The only real thing that helps is when they include actual statistics. At least then I know how many people I got rejected along with.

Without further ado, here are our favorite college rejection letters (waitlist included):

They aren’t the nicest, but they are the funniest!

Please note that while we make fun of these letters and make them sound harsher than they actually are, we are in no way making fun of anyone for being rejected. Many of these letters are our own and our intention in making this article was to let people make fun of their own rejections and know they aren’t the only ones. Everyone will have lots of fun even if they attend a school other than the highly selective dream school from their younger grades. Plus, they’ll save lots of money. And let’s be honest, do you really want to spend the next 4 years at a school known for being one of the hardest in the country? After Magnet, I want a break. And these schools should have some humbling of their own.

1) UNC Chapel Hill

You have to appreciate their audacity of rejecting and then immediately telling you you should consider transferring. They really don’t want to give up that application fee. Or maybe they really do just not want to let you go. The “My hope is that you’ll turn your attention to whatever institution you choose to attend next fall” seems like a bit much to me. I don’t think anyone is really so heartbroken over a rejection that they forget to pay attention to whatever school they actually do attend.

2) USC (California)

This letter starts out very standard. Short, regretful, and to the point. The second paragraph is sweet. However, once we start getting to the third paragraph, it goes downhill. “Numbers don’t tell the whole story” is a true statement, but it seems like they’re just telling you the other candidates’ numbers are better. The statistics are, as always, appreciated though. I think where this letter really gets intense when they say “ours is a qualitative process, in which opinions are weighted with facts. Your application was carefully, respectfully, and thoughtfully reviewed many times, by many individuals.” As an applicant, I really would rather think they rejected my application based on my numbers without a second thought rather than that they took the time to get to know my entire application and then rejected me.

3)Vanderbilt:

To be fair, it took me 5 minutes to find the Vanderbilt rejection letter, so it was probably well deserved. However, I really do think colleges should realize they shouldn’t emphasize how carefully they reviewed your application if they rejected you. I would much rather think you rejected me as a piece of paper than a person. Also, I am not quite sure what I would contact Vanderbilt about after rejecting me? Ask for a recommendation? Confess my undying love for them? Ask them if Taylor Swift ever visits campus?

4) MIT

This letter was shortt. After writing 5 supplementals and the Common App, I honestly expected more pizzazz in their rejection. I do appreciate the statistics: “This year we had nearly 27,000 candidates for fewer than 1,400 offers of admission”. I mean it is MIT, so the rejection was very expected. I love how they say that “this is in no way a judgement of you as a student or as a person” BUT more of a comparison to “the applicant pool than anything else”. They really did try to disguise the harsh truth with nice commentary so I commend them for that. This letter also has a great ending by making extraaa clear that “all decisions are final”. I really appreciate the straight foward tone and finality instead of being too fake nice. The conclusion is also pretty good by saying we “wish you the best in all of your future endeavors”. Honestly true though we can’t all be ultra geniuses that go to MIT but “it will all work out in the end”.

5) Johns Hopkins

My friend sent me this one immediately after getting it because she knew I’d find the brevity of it funny. They really acted as if they had to pay per word. Unlike other schools, they did not waste the time to compliment you and let you know you were also a competitive applicant. Instead, they simply said that there were many competitive applicants. I find the link to a FAQ page hilarious. Couldn’t they just put that in the letter? Also what questions do people have???

6) Duke

This letter is either the meanest nice letter or the nicest mean letter. The entire thing is super sweet and complimentary, but in no way was it necessary to point out that this applicant was a legacy. Like, you already have the potential for upset parents who feel betrayed by the university, and then they’re giving

A reminder of the personal and financial investment your family has to the university? Harsh. I do think the rest of the letter might make up for it in kindness though. For example “my staff and I were humbled by your accomplishments and the work it took to achieve them,” “it’s clear to us that you have great potential for much success in college and beyond,” and “you will achieve that success in the years to come.” Plus, how upset can you be with those statistics?

The ones that are actually nice:

Wellesley

They genuinely sound sorry. I like the phrasing “it is not possible for us to offer admission to all students who could be successful here.” So sweet. If only they could.

Waitlist:

NC State Honors College

What can I say, North Carolina schools know what they are doing. My favorite line is “we reviewed each application at least twice.” They REALLY wanted me to know they were absolutely sure I shouldn’t be accepted the first go around. I also love the assumption “I know you are disappointed by this decision.” I probably should have been, but this letter was hard to take seriously. You also have to appreciate the complete 180 from we are positive we don’t want you to but I mean if our first choices bail… In all seriousness, I do love how they told me just how many people applied and how many were accepted. That actually did really dull the blow.

Boston University

This waitlist letter is pretty basic except for 2 things that should be noted. First, they say that their waitlist is “short”, although according to trusty google, they waitlist 15,000 students with a hope of accepting maybe 4. Second, it all starts going downhill in the end. They basically say that they will give me no money:

The ones that are actually nice:

College of Charleston Honors Interview Weekend Scholarship

1. This is how a nice rejection letter should be written. It sounds sincere but doesn’t go too far. It perfects the compliment sandwich. We enjoyed your time. You’re an alternate. You have priority housing. The phrasing “If funding becomes available, we will review the select group of candidates on the alternate list and make additional offers” sounds a lot nicer than if our initial students reject their offers you might receive one. I’m pretty sure everyone in the honors college has priority housing, but it was still nice to mention it here.

2. Boston College Rejection

One line in this rejection letter makes it stand out and seem personalized. It starts out with the classic “we appreciate your time” statement. BUT then this letter states “Each year, the majority of candidates seeking admission to Boston College demonstrates the potential to be successful here. This is certainly true in your case”. That one line makes this letter. They actually recognize that you out of all the applicants would definitely succeed at Boston College. At some point, we have to recognize that colleges honestly just have to find a way to narrow down their applicants and I wouldn’t be surprised if it is random.

Barnard’s waitlist letter

From reading this letter, you can tell this isn’t their first rodeo. As opposed to a breakup, this feels more like Barnard telling me “it’s just a break.” After all, “admission remains a possibility.” Knowing their waitlist statistics, I know that isn’t quite true, but I still appreciated hearing it. Not only did I appreciate the kindness of the letter, it was also quite functional. The bolded words tempered my expectations immediately, and I also knew exactly what I had to do. The waitlist reply form was hard to find, but other than that 10/10.

Northwestern rejection letter

Ok, so as we all know Northwestern rejects a lot of people so they are definitely experienced in this process and their rejection letter reflects just that. They start out with some good statistics to make sure you know that you aren’t the one who got rejected. Then they go on to say “we cannot admit all of the qualified applicants who apply to Northwestern”. It really lessens the blow that they recognize that they just don’t have the space to admit everyone who would excel at the school. And I mean as applicants we are literally a piece of paper to them so they have to find a way to lessen the stack somehow. They go on to say “We simply are unable to admit all of the students who present a solid record of achievement”.

The Ivy League:

Honestly, all the rejection letters from the Ivys are pretty nice, a testament to their great experience in rejections. They all seem to recognize their large applicant pool and small student body. To be honest, they spend too much time saying how strong their applicant pool was but honestly we all know why we were rejected. These letters are nice but too boring so I suggest they do better.

Sparknotes Best Phrases:

Harsh:

UGA: “This concludes your options for further consideration as a first-year student at the University of Georgia”

Duke: “especially given your family tie to the University”

USC (California): “numbers don’t tell the whole story”

UC Santa Barbara: “Be assured that our admissions officers looked closely at your grades, coursework, honors and awards, volunteer and work experience, leadership, and how well you made use of the academic opportunities at your school. The collective strength of these factors within our applicant pool was the highest in students we were able to admit”

Sweet:

Boston College: “the potential to be successful here. This is certainly true in your case”

Barnard (waitlist): “admission remains a possibility”

Our ideas to make rejection letters better:

An accepted students network but for rejections
1. This way we can send memes and bond over our shared “trauma”. Instead of longingly looking at the students who did get in and wondering what got them, we can look at our fellow amazing rejectees and see it really wasn’t personal.
Personalized commentary (if it’s good)
1. For example, if my essays are great even if the rest of my application sucked, let me know. If my teachers are excellent recommenders, let me know.
A list of other colleges to apply to
1. Hear me out: it’s like Netflix’s “if you liked this show you might like….” but if you liked this college, we really think you would do well at…
This might be a controversial opinion, but I think if colleges reject me, they should also send me a rejection letter in the mail. I want them to pay that 52 cents to tell me to my face, and if I have a paper copy, I can dramatically rip it up.