First, I would like to personally thank all of the people who have chosen to ignore this absurd event called “Coming Home”. As most know, spirit week, or Coming Home is five torturous days of obnoxious students dressed in costumes relating to themes made by Student Council. This week is the worst week at Magnet. If you want to survive this terrible, horrible, awful week of spirit and so called “fun”, just follow these steps.

1. DO NOT DRESS UP- Whatever you do, do not dress up according to the theme of each day. To show that you are cooler than any kid at Magnet, come to school in your normal clothes. Those kids that actually go all out and have elaborate costumes are lame. Your regular wardrobe makes you stand out of the crowd.
2. IF you do dress up (which is one of the Seven Deadly Sins), DO NOT ACT SPIRITED- School spirit is soooooooo middle school. Do not act like you love your school and do not participate in class cheers or class events. It’s very simple stuff.
3. DO NOT GO TO THE PEP RALLY- The pep rally is a waste of time. There is too much energy, excitement, music, and cheering. Sitting and cheering with your best friends and supporting your class and school is not a good time. If you are forced to attend the pep rally, just sit at the very top corner of the bleachers, plug in your headphones, and listen to depressing music.

Finally…

4. DO NOT GO TO THE BASKETBALL GAME- The basketball game, like the pep rally, is another a waste of time. Supporting your school’s teams and seniors at one of the biggest games of the season is the worst way you can spend your Friday night. Wouldn’t you rather eat frozen pizza with your parents while watching Antiques Roadshow? The games are not fun, nor are they ever exciting. If your misunderstood, spirit seeking friends drag you to the game, you have two options: 1. Don’t be their friend anymore or 2. Come to the game and DO NOT CHEER. This part is very important. All you have to do is take up space in the bleachers and do not pay attention to the game. Everyone will know that you actually are really cool and they will want to be your friend.

So, this is all you need to do to get the whole school to love you during spirit week! Happy Coming Home!